Saturday, January 19, 2013

Letting Go; A Ritual for Release & Acceptance

"One of the most important skills we can acquire in life is the ability to respond well to loss and disappointment. The first step in doing so is to give up the assumption that, when we suffer a loss, that something is 'wrong.' Nothing is wrong. Loss is a part of life. Sometimes there is a sadness, a silence, a despair, or a loneliness that just needs to be listened to." ~Katherine Woodward Thomas

This odd little pink package hanging from a tree in my backyard, is me letting go 

The past, (specifically with my former husband), Fear, Control, Judgement of self & others Worry for my son and the future....They are all bundled up-- along with old roses, wedding pictures, sand from the beach we lived on in California, & other mementos-- in the pink t-shirt that I was wearing on the night my former mate asked me out on our first date in October of 2008. They are hanging on a tree in my backyard in the middle of January to face their fate. It's winter; They don't stand a chance.

The "little deaths that compel us to grope through the dark nights of our souls are what most of us avoid the most. We'd rather just take a pill and be happy all the time than feel the searing pain of loss and of being lost. But there's a huge folly here. If we don't surrender and let things die away and dissolve into mystery and darkness, there's no space from which anything new can be reborn." ~ Sarah Avant Stover, The Way of the Happy Woman (p. 236)

The inspiration for this project comes via the nature of the season and my beautiful friend, Susan who told me of the decay bundle she was making in honor of the recent passing of her brother. In the spirit of the project (created by artist, Seth Apter), I collected a menagerie of things that needed to be let go of...

This is also a wonderful process for children, who are new and unpracticed in art of letting go. I certainly plan to remember this for the inevitable times to come when my son faces the harder tides of life...I can see both the necessity and beauty of a decay ball in times such as a loss of pet, the passing of a family member, transitioning to puberty...

For history on The Disintegration Collaboration (aka, the DisCo Project):

Seth Apter's Blog:

Ideas on starting your own Decay Bundle:

A seperate practice, wonderful in the release specifically of relationships, via Gabby Berstein:

1 comment:

  1. I am so happy that my DisCo project has inspired you in this way. Thank you! You have taken it one step further and added such a personal and meaningful component to this. I look forward to seeing what transpires and hope you will keep in touch and let me know how this process changes the bundle and you!